Delicious Heartache
by Purple-Pebbles
Summary: Kagome recklessly runs deep into an unknown forest and comes across a demon that wants to break her. Without her friends and weapon in sight, how will she get away?
1. Chapter 1

**Delicious Heartache**

A masochist is a person who feels gratified by pain and degradation that is self-imposed or imposed by another person; a person who finds pleasure in self-denial and submissiveness.

Was she such a person? Kagome wondered as she took in the scene playing out in front of her. Could that be the reason why she followed him out into the forest knowing fully well what she would find?

No, she firmly decided. She most definitely isn't a masochist, because such a person would not feel as she did now; torn, twisted and gutted with her heart crying out in unmeasurable agony and despair as it bled grief, misery, and regret.

No, she derived no pleasure from this scene and yet, and yet she had still followed him, unable to let known matters rest.

She couldn't make out their words from where she was standing, but the adoring expression on the hanyou's face was like a knife to her chest, to only be twisted in more painfully by the way he caressed her cheek oh so carefully and lovingly with the back of his hand.

Kagome wanted to look away when he leaned down to kiss her, wanted to close her eyes and run from the tender scene that she's intruding in, but instead, she stood immobile as she watched the lovers embrace, unable to prevent the tears from streaming down her cheeks in twin rivers of heartache.

She didn't know how much time passed by for her just standing there, watching them and silently crying from her carefully chosen spot behind one of the trees.

Why did she allow herself to watch her worst nightmare come true and be tortured by it so? Why was it that only once their actions grew more passionate and desperate did she manage to avert her gaze away to the blackened forest crowded with unknown shadows of the night?

She got a terrible idea. Probably the worst one she's ever had, but before she could talk herself out of it she started backing away, slowly at first, not wanting to alert the couple to her presence, but then the man she loved shed his red Fire-Rat robe and she quickly turned around and started sprinting as fast as her limbs would carry her.

At that moment all she knew, all she could allow herself to think about was that she wanted to get away, far away from everything that was causing her so much distress and hurt. So she ran into the unknown territory, stumbling over loose rocks and roots as she went, with her tears blinding her already obscured vision.

She was barely able to breathe through her choked sobs. She wanted to scream and vent, wanted to trash everything and anything that came in her path, but most of all she wanted to run home into her mother's arms, allowing her to soothe her sorrow away.

What she truly wanted was to go back in time, or forwards really. In any case, she wanted to go to the time before she had come to this era and was entrusted with the duty to protect the Shikon Jewel but most importantly, what she wants is to stop herself from ever pulling out that damned arrow from his shoulder. She wants this nightmare she's tumbled into to end and the memories she's acquired along the way gone with it.

Finally, after venturing far too deep into the forest and running for far too long, she came to a staggering halt, chest heaving and body trembling with exhaustion and cold. Desperately in need of resting her aching muscles, she leaned back against a large tree trunk and closed her eyes.

Her chest felt tight, her legs and lungs burned, and her exposed legs were filled with scratches. She's a complete mess that barely managed to keep herself on her feet, but at least she was too exhausted to feel that all-consuming misery and rage that had fueled her sprint.

Kagome slid down the rough tree bark, ignoring the painful way it was digging into her back, leaving colorful bruising behind, no doubt. She hugged her knees close to her chest and leaned her head back against the tree bark, attempting to force the air in and out of her lungs at a regulated pace and trying to ignore the dry scratching in her throat as best as she could.

What a fool she was. What a complete and utter fool.

How could she possibly have thought that she would ever be able to measure up to Kikyo?

How could she ever even entertain the thought that one day she would be enough for him? Had time not been generous and shown her enough? Why had she insisted on clinging to this unrealistic hope? It's brought her nothing but pain, and yet she continued to peruse it, continued to allow it to break her.

Love really does make a fool out of us all, she thought with a dark chuckle falling from her lips, terse and brief at first until her shoulders started shaking and she was unable to control herself. Broken and insane laughter filled the night air around her, accentuated by the hysterical sobs she wasn't able to stop.

Such a damned fool.

She had allowed herself to hope and dream and now that she's been forced to face the unbearable truth she had no one but herself to blame.

He would never belong to her, and now she just had to find a way to live with that.

''Well don't you just smell, delicious,'' a deep masculine voice echoed around her, startling her out of her self-pity and abruptly cutting off her insane laughter.

Kagome instantly jumped to her feet, regulated heartbeat once again racing against time itself. She frantically started looking around her for the culprit of the voice, but it was too dark for her to make anything out. The trees were obscuring any light coming from the stars and moon that hung above them.

All she could see was a thick mist that was now gathering on top of the ground and around her feet, spreading wildly in all patterns.

Kagome reached for her back and silently cursed herself for not getting her bow and arrows on this little expedition of hers. She was now thoroughly cornered and had absolutely no way of protecting herself from whatever it is that was about to attack her.

Genius, Kagome. Just genius she thought to herself bitterly.

''Who's there?'' she asked bravely, surprised and proud that her voice came out steady even though she felt like a nervous wreck.

''Did you know that I could smell you from miles away?'' the echoing voice asked amusedly, completely ignoring her question. ''You were practically calling out to me, inviting me to come claim your darkening, sorrowful aura.''

Kagome's uninvited guest chuckled lightly, making her wince with how it sounded so uncomfortably similar to her own. She tried to ignore the chills it gave her and steeled herself against what was to come.

''You must have the wrong address, pal,'' she started, ignoring the voice inside her head screaming at her to shut the hell up. ''There is no company needed here tonight. So you might as well start moving along,'' she urged the voice, trying to gulp down her rising fear.

''Oh, precious child. You should know better than that,'' the voice chided her mockingly. ''I don't much like that mouth you have on you,'' it tsked making her grit her teeth together at the irritating sound.

The fact that she still wasn't able to locate where the voice was coming from wasn't boosting her confidence any. It was coming from all directions, surrounding and cornering her, and that fact wasn't easing away any of her worries either.

''You are filled to the brim and soaked in heartache, precious. So much of it that I can already taste it upon my tongue and let me assure you, precious. It tastes divine,'' the voice laughed maliciously, invoking waves of fear and disgust inside her.

She tried to push away her anxiety and took a deep breath to keep her teeth from rattling from the chill that came over her with the arrival of the unknown youkai. She removed her bangs from her eyes and balled her hands into fists at her side and tried to gather her thoughts together. There had to be a way out of this. There was always a way out.

What is this demon? What did it want from her? Should she try to run? But which direction? The voice seemed to be everywhere at once and she had no way to figure out how to escape it. Especially not if it could emerge and attack at any given moment and place.

She didn't much like the odds for her success, but she liked them even less simply cornered against the tree.

Before she could continue thinking about how utterly dead she was, something started martializing from the suspicious mist that had gathered on the ground.

The mist took shape and before her stood a dark robed, handsome youkai with long blue hair that flowed past his hips and glowing violet eyes. His sharp ivory cheeks were adorned with markings the same vibrant shade as his hair.

A relieved sigh almost escaped her when she saw that he had no weapons on him. Maybe she wasn't as dead as she had thought.

''What do you want?'' she snarled. Having gotten some of her confidence back she narrowed her eyes and stared at him with a deep glower on her face.

''I wonder,'' he whispered with widening eyes, once again ignoring her question. The youkai's lips then stretched into a sinister smile that had Kagome very much on alert, with all the little hairs on her body standing at attention.

Before she could even try and start to understand what was happening she was swirling around in a black and blue mist, and then, the very next moment she was standing next to a startlingly familiar well. Kagome had to blink a few times for her eyes to adjust to the blinding sun hanging high above her but once they did she frowned at her surroundings.

How did she manage to get here?

Kagome turned around, trying to get her bearings together when she caught sight of a shade of silver and red that could only belong to Inuyasha, and- was that herself he was holding close to his chest?

How was this possible? Were her eyes deceiving her? How could she be in two places at once? Was she dreaming?

She tried to call out to Inuyasha, but no words sounded from her parted lips. Her hands instantly flew to her throat, and her eyes widened in horror.

What happened to her voice?

She tried to speak, scream and rage but to no avail, her voice seemed to have fled her.

''Watch them, precious,'' he commanded gleefully. ''Isn't this exactly what your heart desires most?'' he taunted her, and she unwillingly felt her eyes draw back to Inuyasha and what seemed to be her double.

Inuyasha was kissing down the neck of her double and Kagome could hear her moan softly.

She wanted to look away, needed to look away from what could never be, but even that was denied to her. It was as if she was no longer in authority of her own body.

Startled and frightened by this new development she tried to move, but it didn't matter how hard or how viciously she fought, she wasn't able to budge. After struggling for a while, she came to the horrifying realization that the youkai had somehow managed to paralyze and trap her inside her own body.

''You want him to love you, don't you, my precious?'' he asked her coyly.

''I can taste how much you crave his love, there's no need for you to be shy about it. You want him to touch you, and you alone don't you?'' he asked her in an alluring and seductive echo, causing a disgusted bile to rise inside her throat.

She desperately wanted to close her eyes, but she was forced to watch as Inuyasha continued to please and lavish her double's body with attention.

''Do you want that? Can you hear how you're making him groan and hiss in need? Do you see how much he desires you?'' the voice murmured into her ear. She tried to move away from him, forgetting for a moment that the demon has taken away all control over her actions. She wasn't even allowed to clench her jaw together which only helped to add frustration to her ever-growing pile of havoc wracking emotions.

Her emotions were intensifying at a rapid pace, and it was quickly becoming too much for her to handle. Betrayal and abandonment clashed furiously against lust and jealousy, seething in rage and disappointment. She felt as if there was an animal raging inside her, trying to claw its way free from her skin.

Just as unexpectedly as the last time, she was swirling in a black and blue mist and the scene changed again, the sun now was gone and, in its place, hung a bright full moon.

Once Kagome's eyes adjusted to the blinding darkness around her, she found herself surrounded by the sight of a painfully familiar set of trees. The very same trees she had hidden behind, run and backed away from not so long ago.

Once her brain managed to process the scene, she continued her struggle to move and started to frantically fight against the invisible hold that was pushing against her, but it was no use. She was going to be powerless to stop what was about to happen.

''Watch, precious,'' the blue-haired youkai ordered sharply.

''Watch the unpleasant reality and feed me your misery,'' he urged, chuckling menacingly behind her.

She didn't want to obey his command; definitely didn't want to watch what she already knew she would see. She knew that if she did it would crush the last piece of her heart that was left.

Unfortunately, as Kagome had no control over her actions, her head started turning to the side, and she helplessly watched her world slipping away from her.

There was the first man she ever loved, no longer lavishing attention and love to a body that looked like her own. No, of course not. How silly of her to even dare hope. It was just her sort of luck that instead, she would have to watch him worshipping a body that is regrettably too familiar to her.

'''Yasha,'' Kikyo gasped wantonly. ''Don't stop,'' she begged him, hoarse voice filled with desperation.

She pushed Inuyasha's head closer to her heat and lifted her hips, trying to spur him on.

Encouraged by her begging, Inuyasha reached for her left breast and started playing with her rosy nipple, sending Kikyo's head back and eliciting a long, deep, moan from her.

Inuyasha groaned and seemed to double his efforts, making the woman beneath him scream out in pleasure.

With every second she was made to endure this torture, Kagome felt herself weakening more and more.

'Please stop this,' Kagome begged inwardly, hoping that the youkai was able to hear her. 'I can't take any more of this cruelty,' she screamed inside her head. 'No more!' She sobbed.

The blue haired youkai chuckled. ''Oh, my sweet precious. Your heartache tastes, unlike any other heartache I've ever tasted before. So much sweet, delicious, pain,'' he moaned appreciatively.

''I've never tasted so much unrequited love before and doused in such violent self-hatred no less. Don't fret, my precious. Soon enough you will be left numb to the world. You'll become just a shell of your former precious self. Just keep on watching and let me devour your delicious heartache,'' he cackled, throwing in that insane laugh.

As she kept watching Inuyasha claim Kikyo over and over again, she felt her life gradually drain out of her.

She didn't know how long she'd been watching for when she suddenly felt a small ripple beneath her feet. It was only the slightest interference, but it was enough to divert her thoughts away from the coupling happening in front of her, even if her eyes couldn't cooperate.

''What's this now?'' the unnamed youkai sighed, irritated by the disturbance.

''Who dares to interrupt my dinner?'' he asked in the coldest tone she had yet to hear from him.

Gone was the satisfactory and seductive lilt, instead it was replaced by a hiss that clearly showed his sadistic intent.

Kagome's vision swirled around her and once again filled with the black and blue mist she has become accustomed to. Before she could invest too much thought into her next destination, she found herself leaning against the same tree where she had encountered the youkai.

She was too weak to keep her weight on her feet, and so she went tumbling down to the ground into what she knew should have been a very painful collision.

''Kagome!'' she heard someone bellow out desperately and felt a prodding need to seek out the distant voice but she felt too weak to continue fighting against the veiled force.

''Let go of my woman!'' she heard their new party guest insist menacingly.

He sounded familiar, and for some reason he made her feel something akin to safe. How could she possibly feel safe in a moment like this?

It doesn't matter anyway because everything was fading; sound, sights, smell, touch, thoughts, feelings.

''It seems like it's my lucky night. A delicious feed and two Shikon shards. My- my- my- how very fortuitous,'' the heartache feeding youkai chuckled gleefully.

''Dream on parasite!'' her rescuer growled. ''Release my woman from your hold, you abomination. Or else,'' the new, warmer voice threatened.

My woman? There was only ever one person that called her that.

Could it be possible that by some miracle he has come to save her from her prison, or was the demon playing with her mind again?

No, she wouldn't allow herself to hope again. She wouldn't help the demon along by feeding it more disappointment and despair.

The voices started growing further away from her, and even though she was unable to close her eyes she felt her conscious mind drift away, then it drowned in a sea of calming blackness. There was nothing, nothing but endless quiet. Even the calmness eventually started to fade away leaving her to float in a plane of existence and non-existence. Time had no meaning. Everything was meaningless.

Sounds where the first things that came back to her, like the sound of the blood rushing loudly in her ears, the rustling of the leaves next to her head or a name being repeated, voiced so pleadingly that it hurt her already destroyed heart.

Where was she?

Who was this person beckoning her out so urgently and despairingly? She wanted to reassure whoever it was that she was going to be fine, but she was too weak.

Her emotions come flooding in next. All the anguish and helplessness that had been sucked out of her before came rushing back in and flowed through all her senses.

So much pain and misery. Why? Why did she feel so much pain?

After her emotions, unfortunately, her memories were the next things to come back to her, and as the images started connecting to her brain, a reality she would have rather misremembered got thrown at her.

She didn't want to remember. Why was she remembering?

She didn't want to feel all these horrible emotions. She preferred the numbness, preferred the soft blackness that had surrounded her and flushed away all her grief.

Why was she back here? Everything was too loud and intense. She didn't want to be here anymore. She'd been fine where she was.

''That parasitic emotion-feeding youkai is gone Kagome,'' the distant but soothingly deep voice once again broke through her consciousness.

She knew to whom the voice belonged, someone familiar. Could it be?

But it didn't matter because she didn't want to be here.

''You're safe now. I'll protect you, Kagome,'' he promised before he scooped her up into his arms.

''K-Ko-ga?'' Kagome managed to force past her lips in a broken murmur.

''Rest, Kagome,'' he ordered, pulling her closer to his chest as he made his way through the forest.

''H-hurts,'' she choked out, feeling her tears once again escape her eyes.

''Nothing will hurt you ever again, I will never let anything happen to you again,'' he vowed. ''Rest. You need to rest. I'm here,'' he reassured her.

Unwillingly she obeyed Kouga's command and felt herself drift off into a fitful sleep.

After a few moments, Kouga felt Kagome's breathing even out and was finally able to relax his tense muscles and frazzled nerves.

It had been nothing but pure luck that had led him close enough to them to allow him to get a strong whiff of Kagome and that parasite's scent.

He had been looking for that parasite for the past few weeks, but he was never able to catch his scent or find any tracks left behind him at all. He could never see him, but he always felt the odd sensation of being watched and hunted.

Tonight, he had been patrolling the forest, as it had become a habit of his. He hadn't thought that he would be fortunate enough to find him, but he did.

He found him draining the life out of his Kagome.

When he had caught his woman's scent tangled with the youkai's, and none of Inutrasha's own, sheer terror and dread had spurred his legs into action, allowing him to run faster than he had ever run before.

Where exactly was that stupid mutt? Wasn't he meant to protect her? Wasn't he supposed to keep Kagome safe from precisely what she had faced tonight?

How could her friends have allowed her to travel so deep into the forest, all on her own? Where had they all been when that youkai was about to devour everything that made Kagome who she was? They were supposed to be her pack! The mutt had failed, and it had once again been up to him to fight of the youkai and save Kagome. But what if he hadn't been patrolling? What would have happened to her if he hadn't by some stroke of luck decided to leave earlier than he usually does?

Kouga looked down at Kagome's frail body lying limply in his arm, growled and bared his teeth, enraged by what had been allowed to happen to her.

Killing the parasite had not been enough to extinguish his anger. The mutt was going to die. Sooner or later he will have to pay for what he allowed to happen tonight.

Stupid, good-for-nothing, hanyou mutt that didn't deserve to breathe the same air as this beautiful creature lying helplessly in his arms. He isn't and will never be deserving of her pure and unconditional love.

The self-centered egotist isn't deserving of life!

One day the hanyou Inuyasha will meet his end by his claws, this he swore.

Kagome whimpered and shivered violently in his arms. Wanting to seek shelter for his freezing woman as quickly as possible he quickened his pace and started running faster, leaving a cloud of thick dust behind him.

Once he arrived at a nearby cave, he settled her gently onto the ground and started preparing a fire to warm up his woman, not liking the way she was shaking in her sleep and curling into herself.

A few minutes later he had gathered enough wood to get a decent fire going and settled onto the cold and hard ground, as close as he could get to the warm, flickering, amber flame.

He pulled Kagome carefully onto his lap, hoping that his furs and tail could provide her with some more heat, even if his armor may not be comfortable to lean against.

He sighed in relief when she didn't stir awake with the jostling and allowed himself to get comfortable against the cave walls.

Unable to stop it his mind wandered back to the scene where he had found Kagome helplessly splayed on the ground, with her eyes open but empty and lifeless. For one horrible, heartbreaking moment he thought she was dead and lost to him. At that moment he felt everything slipping away from him. Any hope she had given him by stepping into his life vanishing with her.

He couldn't take the thought of his Kagome, lifeless and to never smile at him again. It had nearly robbed him from all of his control, calling out his wolf as it clawed and howled inside him in despair. Fortunately, he caught the faint fluttering of her heart in time. She was alive. There still had been time to save her.

Save her he did, but what did he save? Would there be anything left of the woman he loved when she woke in the morning?

Will her eyes still shine as brightly as they always have or will they still be dead, swirling with despair and anguish?

Will she ever be able to breathe easy again?

Will her nights be sleepless and filled with endless haunting pictures?

Had he arrived in time to save her from a life filled with nothing but nightmares and blackness?

Then his thoughts turned even darker and took a twisted detour downhill.

Only deep pain and helplessness could have called out the youkai from the shadows it's been hiding in, it's one of the reasons why the youkai never attacked him.

So, he was left with one question, what had happened to his beautiful Kagome that was horrible enough to lure the parasite out?

Who had dared hurt his woman so?

Was it the mutt? Was it her friends? What happened to her? What could he possibly do for her?

So many questions and so many thoughts.

He hated thinking deeply. It always confused him and left him in a state of unrest. He was a wolf of action, but there was nothing more for him to do tonight but wait. Wait for his woman's beautiful eyes to open and hope to be able to fulfill her every whim.

She will smile, and she will laugh. Her eyes will sparkle, and she will feel happiness again.

With raven black and azure blue swirling around in his mind, he drifted off to a restless sleep filled with concerns for his woman. His beautiful and broken woman.

* * *

The next morning Kagome woke up to the delicious scent of cooking fish wafting up her nose, teasingly tickling her hungry stomach.

When she moved and stretched her limbs, she noticed that she felt unusually sore this morning. After all of this time sleeping on the forest ground she got used to the feeling, but her back felt particularly painful.

With her reflection on pain, a flood of memories came rushing back to her, making her gasp and clamp her eyelids shut tighter together in denial.

No, she was still dreaming. It's all been one horrible nightmare produced by her overactive imagination.

She couldn't have possibly been through what she thought she did. It just wasn't possible, but the emptiness she felt where her heart should be is enough to prove her worst fears right.

''Kagome?'' she heard the tender whisper from somewhere to her left, but she just whimpered and pulled her knees closer to her chest rapidly shaking her head from side to side.

Why? Why had she followed him? Why did she have to go and run into the forest without her bow and arrow? How could she have been so reckless? How would she ever be able to forget what she had seen?

It hurt so much, too much for her to bear and keep sane.

Your heart wasn't supposed to break quite so literally when you find yourself faced with unrequited love. What she was feeling couldn't possibly be natural.

She remembers the blackness the youkai had given her, that soft calming blackness that had flushed away her pain. She craved it now, that emptiness, more than anything else because she couldn't live with her heart gone. She'll never be able to muster up the strength to crawl out of this bottomless pit she's been thrust into if her mind's eye kept playing these horrific scenes over and over again.

Kagome felt someone wrap strong arms around her. As startled and frightened as she felt she didn't struggle against the hold because it didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore.

''Shhh,'' he murmured gently, running his fingers soothingly through her hair. ''I'm here,'' the warm voice said into her ear. ''Nothing will hurt you again,'' he promised her almost forcefully.

Kouga? Was this Kouga holding her and promising her protection?

Yes, she's now clearly remembering snippets of last night and how he had saved her from that horrible blue haired youkai.

Kouga had promised to keep her safe last night too. He didn't understand that he couldn't protect her. Not from this.

With those thoughts plaguing her mind she started sobbing harder into Kouga's chest, fisting the fur on his shoulders so she could pull him closer.

She has never cried so much in her life as she has for the past few hours. The tears and sobs simply wouldn't stop pouring out of her.

''You need to drink something, Kagome,'' he told her in a gentle, rumbling tone.

Kouga pulled away from her and Kagome opened her eyes but kept them everted to her lap, not needing him to see just how broken she is. She felt him reach and pull something from behind him and once secured he handed her a leather water bottle filled with fresh water.

She shook her head, slipped off his lap and scrambled away from him until she hit the cave wall on the other side, cowering away from him.

''Drink,'' he ordered, a little sterner this time. ''You need to drink, Kagome, and I just got it fresh from the river this morning,'' he tried to tempt her, swinging the bottle teasingly.

Kagome stubbornly shook her head, refusing the water. She didn't need anything, didn't need anything besides the darkness and calming void that she'd been ripped out from, and it was all Kouga's fault. He just had to save her. But- no! She couldn't allow herself to think this way. Kouga had been trying to keep her safe. He wanted to protect her.

Kouga had done nothing wrong and was now trying his best to take care of her. She didn't have to show her appreciation by being even more difficult than she necessarily had to be.

Sighing, Kagome tentatively reached out for the offered bottle and forced a few experimentally sips down her sore throat. She grudgingly had to admit, even if just to herself, that it did make her feel somewhat better, at least clearing her throat wasn't as painful anymore.

''I cooked you some fish,'' he told her, trying to act nonchalant but he couldn't contain the wide, satisfied grin that spread over his face at the fact that she had accepted the water he offered her.

She had allowed him to take care of her!

Maybe she would also take the food he cooked for her. She needed to get her strength back, she had to know that, and he had heard her stomach growl not too long ago.

''You humans like your fish cooked, right? I'm pretty sure that you could have probably done a better job, but at least it will give you your strength back. Wait, so stupid!'' he groaned, slapping his forehead. ''I should have asked you first! But don't worry, if you don't want fish I can go and hunt whatever you request.'' he offered. ''You just tell me what you'd like, and I'll quickly go and hunt it down for you,'' he rambled, nervously rubbing at the back of his neck.

''I'm sorry,'' he apologized sheepishly. ''I sometimes tend to forget to think things through properly. I was already down by the river when I saw the fish and thought breakfast!''

''Kouga,'' Kagome interrupted him in a whisper before he could keep on ranting. Even with all the pain that filled her his voice gave her comfort and curiously enough it almost made her lips twitch. Even so, she didn't want him to work himself into a frenzy over deciding which food to hunt down for her.

She was about to refuse his offer of food, but then her stomach grumbled in disagreement. ''Fish sounds delicious,'' she mumbled with much effort, hiding behind her bangs.

Kouga cleared his throat and mumbled just as quietly, ''Alright then,'' he gulped, afraid he'd scare her away with the wrong movement, just like one of their frightened little cubs back home.

Kagome ran an unsteady hand through her disheveled locks and tried to straighten out the mess that was her hair as best as she could without having a brush at hand to untangle the knots.

Kagome sat up from her crouched position and moved closer to the comforting warmth of the fire. When Kouga handed her the fish he'd so thoughtfully prepared for her she finally managed to look up and into his waiting eyes, but she quickly unlocked her gaze from his when she heard the sharp intake of his breath.

''Thank you,'' she mumbled and promptly busied herself with a bite from the fish, ignoring the way it burned her tongue and the roof of her mouth.

After a long stretch of uncomfortable silence, Kouga spoke up.

''I'm sorry,'' he said in a defeated tone. ''So sorry,'' he groaned again, dropping his head in shame. He opened his mouth as if he wanted to say more but shook his head and took his seat on the other side of the small cave, resting his chin on top of one of his raised knees.

Kagome's eyebrows creased and she bit the inside of her cheek before voicing her confusion. ''What do you have to apologize for, you s-saved me,'' she told him but refused to meet his eyes, preferring to keep her gaze on the cooked and skewered fish in between her hands.

She couldn't let him see that she didn't feel like he saved her. She couldn't let him see how damned she is because of his actions, because he hadn't allowed her to get lost inside the void.

''I'm sorry for whatever happened that lured out the parasite, and I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you from whatever happened to you,'' he whispered hoarsely, rubbing an agitated hand over his face.

''It wasn't your place to protect me,'' she tried to reassure him, doing her best to muster up a small smile for him. ''You couldn't have known that I would be out in those woods, alone and about to be attacked. I'm just happy you got there before-'' she cut herself off, biting the corner of her lower lip. What could she possibly say to him? I'm thrilled you got there before I could reach my salvation?

''You're my woman and I failed to protect you,'' the stubborn wolf demon insisted with that same regretful broken voice.

''I'm a big girl, Kouga. I shouldn't have run off to start with,'' she admitted, ashamed of her actions. Her carelessness could have cost Kouga his life. What if he hadn't managed to kill the youkai? He would have died trying to save her.

Kouga didn't know how to respond to that, forcing a strained silence between them, and just like that, Kagome's mind started wandering towards places she never wanted to be in again.

She tried to focus on the food in her mouth, but it tasted like poison.

All she could hear was Kikyo's moans and Inuyasha's pleased groans.

All she could see was flesh meeting flesh repeatedly in a passionate embrace.

She wanted to forget it all happened, desperately needed to put it all behind her. Kamis have mercy on her. She wouldn't survive if she had to live through this every day.

Maybe it would have been better if Kouga hadn't found her, it would have been more merciful on her if she had just lost herself in that oblivious darkness the youkai had offered her.

That darkness- she had felt no pain then, she hadn't felt anything at all. Her memories had slipped away from her to. Isn't that what she was craving now? That darkness that had comfortably wrapped around her and chased her anguish away.

She could hear Kouga calling out to her, but his voice was far away and fading, it was fading, she realized. Everything was fading away just like it had the night before. She might have felt joy and relief had the void not already touched her heart.

''Kagome! Answer me!'' Kouga tried to get her attention, but she was unresponsive. He grabbed her by the shoulders and started shaking her with no success. ''I swear, if you don't answer me right now I will slap you!'' he promised with no real threat in his tone.

He was losing her, and he didn't know how to get her back.

Yuuta had gotten like this, and none of the pack members had been able to get through to him. He couldn't lose Kagome like that. He wouldn't allow her to end her life.

''You are stronger than this, Kagome!'' he bellowed, fighting back the tears. He wouldn't cry, he needed to be strong; strong enough for the both of them.

''I don't care what he showed you because you are stronger than anything he could have done to you. Think of your little fox demon, Kagome. Think about how much you love him and how much pain he would be in if something happened to you. Is that what you want? Kagome! DAMMIT!'' he roared, plunging his hand through the cave wall.

Not knowing what else to do he grabbed her shoulders and lifted her up to her feet and slammed her against the abused cave wall.

''Wake – the – hell – UP!'' he commanded, accentuating each word with an unpleasant shove to the wall. ''Whatever happened isn't worth your pain, and whatever happened is most definitely not worth your life. Do you hear me, Kagome! Nothing is more important than you. You need to live. You have to because Kami, you have to! I cannot-'' he chocked, searching her eyes for any sign that she had heard him.

''Kagome,'' he pleaded, gently running his knuckles over her cheek. ''You know how much I love you. Don't do this to me. Don't leave me,'' he begged. ''Your brothers would be devastated if anything happened to you. Don't make me tell Ginta and Hakkaku that they've lost a sister to the parasite. The pack has barely mourned for Yuuta.''

Kagome heard his pleadings, but she couldn't understand.

She was comfortable, and everything was going to be fine as long as she stayed here.

She didn't know how she knew that she had to stay here, in the darkness. But she did.

''I love you,'' the broken voice kept repeating. Love? She didn't understand. Why did the voice sound so broken? Had he not found the darkness as she had? Was he searching for the void?

''So many people love you, Kagome.''

Kagome? Kagome- she heard it before, but what did it mean?

Love? People? What- Souta. What was Souta? Why?

Kouga saw her blink, and his heart stuttered in his chest. ''Kagome?'' he asked her gently, not wanting to scare her.

''Come back to me,'' he begged, tracing her face with shaking fingers. ''It will be okay,'' he promised. ''Come back and let me help you; show me how strong you truly are,'' he begged, lifting her chin to direct her waking eyes to look into his.

Souta. Shippo. Sango. Kirara. Miroku. Ko-Kouga. Inuyasha-

Inuyasha- before she could retreat into the darkness everything snapped back in place, overwhelming her.

Kagome gasped and started shaking her head. No. No. No. NO. NO. NO!

Too much - too much of everything.

Why had she allowed him to lure her out of the void?

''Shhh,'' Kouga tried to calm her down and wrapped his arms tightly around her. ''Stay with me Kagome,'' he pleaded into her ear. ''I know it's hard and I know that something happened to you and that you're in a lot of pain. There is nothing that I can do or say to make you feel better. I can even agree on how it's easier for you to give up, but I'm begging you because I'm a selfish wolf; stay with me. I love you too much, Kagome. I love you. I love you. I love you. You know that, and you know that I want to marry you one day. You're my woman, mine and I can't lose you.''

Her head snapped up, and her watery gaze landed on Kouga, the wolf demon that has since his kidnapping of her been nothing but generous with his affections toward her.

He was watching her with sad and worried eyes, beautiful deep blue eyes that settled a soothing calmness over her. Perhaps Kouga could make her forget all those horrible memories; maybe he would be able to help her escape her misery.

''I need t-to forget,'' she hiccupped, biting down on her lower lip anxiously trying to push all her focus on him rather than the voices in her head and images in her head.

''What can I do for you?'' he asked her urgently, begging her with his eyes to tell him what he could do to make her pain go away.

''Make me forget,'' she pleaded brokenly. ''I don't want to remember,'' she shook her head, hair flying around her. ''Don't want to hear...'' she trailed off with a sob.

Kouga lifted her in his arms and sat them down on the hard cave floor. He pulled her to his chest and allowed her to cry on him. ''Tell me what to do, my sweet Miko. Tell me how to help you,'' he begged desperately, running his hand soothingly through her hair.

''Tell me a story, a-anything, just... just help me get my mind off...'' she trailed off, digging the heel of her palm into her eyes, desperately trying to erase the image.

''I'm not the best storyteller, but I'll try,'' he promised, his brain already trying to find a suitable tale to tell his woman.

''A few years ago,'' he started. ''A small little wolf cub roamed the eastern lands. The little tyke did his very best to hide away from his tribe, avoiding his responsibilities and always looking for the next great adventure,'' he chuckled and tilted his head back to rest against the cave wall, losing himself in his memories.

''Obviously, his fierce leader wasn't too impressed by the wolf cub. It also probably didn't help that the tribe leader was the cub's overbearing father, who wanted nothing more than to teach and prepare him for his future role as tribe leader.

''To say that the cub was uncooperative would be one of the biggest understatements ever... stated,'' he settled and snorted. ''He was young and didn't understand that the future of his tribe rested on his shoulders. He didn't realize that if he failed he would be endangering the well-being of all his family. So, he didn't listen and spent too much of his time trying to avoid his calling rather than embracing it. He ran around the forests and climbed the highest mountains, wishing to see the world and hoping that he would find a woman that called to his heart.

''During a time were the grown cub was away on another adventure he received word that his tribe was being attacked, so he rushed back to them but had been too late to save them. He lost a lot of members of his pack that night, including his parents,'' he murmured.

Surprisingly, Kagome reached for his hand and squeezed it gently, trying to offer him what little comfort she could. She had quickly realized that Kouga was telling her about himself and for some reason this meant the world to her. She didn't know much about Kouga. She knows that he is loyal and kind, and she also knows that he is a very open-minded for a youkai, having after all stopped his tribe from hunting humans just because of her.

She didn't know much besides the obvious about him, so she appreciated his effort to open up to her to try and make her feel more comfortable while she was stuck in a horrible situation.

How was it possible for him to still strive to make her feel better and claim her as his? Did he not see what a mess she's become? After the many times, she's denied and rejected him how could he still love her?

Kouga looked down at her, shock clearly showing in his saddened eyes. He gave her a small smile and cleared his throat before continuing.

''Suddenly, the grieving cub was asked to become a fierce and protective leader. He was asked to build the tribe back up and start making decisions he wasn't prepared to make. He felt torn between wanting to flee and wanting to help his tribe. His sense of honor won against his cowardice, in the end, so he stuck by his people hoping for better days.''

''After some time of peace, darkness fell over the tribe once again. The wolf-leader feared that there was no hope left for them, but then suddenly,'' he continued in a more excited whisper. ''The somewhat wizened wolf leader found three shards of the Shikon Jewel and his life hasn't stopped changing since.''

''The wolf was now able to defend his tribe but most of all he didn't feel like a disappointment anymore. For the first time in years, he felt like he could succeed, that he could become the leader his father always had wanted him to be.

''Along the way, the tribe leader found a woman, a woman so special that since the moment his eyes laid on her he was unable to get her off his mind. She's human you see,'' he chuckled, making Kagome roll her eyes at him, but she could feel her lips give a small twitch in return

''The strongest, and the most fascinating woman he had ever met. Long raven locks caressing her soft, pale skin. Such a beautiful contrast, only aided by her fire crackling azure eyes. He had never seen a human act so much like a wolf, not until the beauty had defended her kitsune.

''How perfect could she be, this human that has taken in a young and lost youkai as her own. He'd never met someone so special, selfless and loyal. He had fallen in love with her right then and there, once he had realized that her outer beauty was just a flicker of the breath-taking vision that was her spirit.

''Every time he has seen her since, has only sent him thumbing further and harder in love with her. He can't stop himself,'' he gulped silently and looked away from her. ''He knows she doesn't love him, but that doesn't mean that he can stop loving her, or that he will ever stop needing her. We wolfs mate for life, and he has already chosen his,'' he finished in a hoarse whisper.

Uncountable moments passed with a loud silence ringing between them.

What could she possibly say to him? He had just so sweetly confessed his love to her, not in a brash way, but sincerely, filled with a devotion that left no room for arguments.

So, she did the only thing she could think of and poured her heart out to him.

''Inuyasha was the first person I met when I landed here,'' she started in a broken whisper. ''I had barely managed to get away from Mistress Centipede with my life when I stumbled upon him in the forest. He looked peaceful, even though he had an arrow through his shoulder sealing him to the sacred tree.

''That was the first day I placed my trust in him, and I have been foolish enough to keep on doing so even if time and time again he has given me nothing but reason to distrust him,'' she chuckled humorlessly, shaking her head.

Kouga tried to intervene, but she wouldn't let him. ''Kagome-''

''Don't. Just don't-'' she trailed off, wiping away the treacherous tears.

''He's never promised me anything, and he's never declared his love for me. I was naïve enough to think that he felt torn between us,'' she chuckled. ''I blamed his inability to talk about his feelings. I never wanted to face the cold hard fact that he didn't want me, so I blamed his fear of abandonment. I am the problem not him. Even knowing this I followed him last night. I followed knowing that he was meeting her, but I should have known better.

''I should have just stayed in our camp but for some reason, I needed to see, I needed to see once again with my own eyes. I had myself convinced that I had nothing to worry about, but I knew what would see and I-I still went,'' she chocked.

''I ran as fast as I could to get away from them, with my heart shattered even worse than the Shinkon jewel,'' she said and gave a short laugh.

Kagome closed her eyes and cleared her throat.

''Of course, my stupidity didn't end there. No, it's just so typical of me to rush forward without thinking because I am currently an emotional mess. Because I am me, I somehow managed to forget my bow and arrows. So, there I was, lost deep in the forest, completely unarmed and helpless, when that emotion-feeder found me. It showed me things, things I will never be able to unsee.

''It did something to me, took away all my control and made me watch... and he did something to my emotions. Everything single emotion cursing through my body felt amplified. There was nothing else but the pain, heartache, rage, and betrayal. Then everything started to fade away, and I didn't mind it. The void, it sucked away everything, my pain, and my memories. Now I don't know which is worse. Remembering or not remembering.

''Is it supposed to hurt this much?'' she asked him with an air of desperation. ''This isn't normal, it can't be. It's hard to breathe, and every beat my heart makes sends a shock of dread through my whole body, feeding this furiously burning agony.''

''The youkai messed with your head, Kagome. I'm not going to lie and tell you that it shouldn't hurt. I'm not going to say that it shouldn't feel like the world is going down around you. But what I can tell you is that you will get through this. What I know is that that good for nothing mutt doesn't deserve to be loved by you. What I know without any doubt is that someone as beautiful and strong as you will go on with her life and will one day find someone that she won't be able to take her eyes from, and he will be looking right back at her.''

Kagome's mind was reeling; how could he be so sweet to her? How can he love her when the man she thought she belonged with cared no more for her than an average acquaintance?

He genuinely cares for her in a way that she had always wished Inuyasha would care for her. He has always been honest about his feelings, unashamed to be in love with a human. Why had she never given him a second thought? Was she any better than Inuyasha, ignoring a person's feelings regardless of the damage she may cause? Why couldn't she have given a chance? Why shouldn't she do so now?

Kagome looked up at Kouga from behind her bangs and allowed her eyes to roam over his face. She had to admit that he had very handsome features that she was attracted to, especially those bright blue eyes of his. She found herself unable to look away from them and noticed that he was gazing at her with the same intensity.

How could she have been so blind to what seemed to have been staring at her directly in the face?

He loves her, and she cares for him, so how could she ever know if she can grow to love him if she never gives him a chance?

''Kiss me,'' she whispered under her breath, her face immediately flushing to a bright red as soon as she said the words.

The only reason Kouga heard her timid request is because of his superb wolf hearing.

As it was, Kouga stilled immediately, shocked and unsure that had heard her correctly because she couldn't have possibly, but he was quickly proven wrong when she mustered all her courage and repeated herself, louder this time. ''Kiss me,'' she asked him again with azure eyes shining with anxiety and fear of rejection.

He wanted nothing more than lean in and capture her lips with his and grant her request, but he felt conflicted. His woman was an emotional mess at the moment. She didn't know what she was asking of him, and he didn't want to do something that she might later on regret. He didn't want to do anything that would cause his Kagome any further pain. She'd been through enough to last a lifetime thanks to that emotion-feeder.

''You don't want me,'' she gasped, shuffling away from him, taking his silence and inaction as rejection.

''I do,'' he hurried to assure her, pulling himself out of his thoughts. He reached out for her chin and forced her to look at him so that she could see with her own eyes that he was not lying to her.

''You cannot even imagine how much I want you Kagome,'' he confessed. ''The only thing I don't want is to hurt you any more than you already have been. I don't want to take advantage of you,'' he explained to her. ''And I don't want to do anything you might regret later. I couldn't take you hating me, Kagome.''

''I need to forget,'' she insisted, ignoring the way her heart was trying to beat out of her chest. ''I know you care for me, Kouga. I won't regret it if you make me forget. Please,'' she begged again. ''I don't want to see anymore. I need to feel loved,'' she admitted in a strangled tone, trying to still her shaking hands.

''Kagome,'' he breathed. He felt so conflicted with himself, but her pleading eyes quickly won out against his weak resistance, and he leaned into her and placed his lips tenderly against her own.

She tasted like salt and pain but he didn't care. The feeling of her soft lips against his was everything he dreamed it would be and more.

How many times had he dreamt of the moment where he would have her in his arms? Too many to count, and now, here she was. He would make sure she wouldn't regret it. He would make sure to kiss away all her pain and leave her thoughts fully occupied with him.

He felt her lips brush back against his hesitantly and she experimentally nibbled on his lower lip making him growl deep in his chest in appreciation.

Soon enough his hand left her chin and moved to the back of her neck, bringing her closer to him. His other hand traveled to her waist and pulled her flush against him, needing to feel more of her.

Feeling a little bit more confident Kagome wrapped her arms tightly around his neck, trying to let this sudden onslaught of sensations take over her and allowed herself to forget.

''Kagome,'' he moaned when she pushed him back and moved to straddle him. His hands immediately found their way to her exposed thigh and started tracing her soft skin, committing each touch, sigh, and sound to his memory.

He moved his lips away from hers and chuckled huskily when a disappointed groan passed her luscious lips.

Before she could claim his lips again, he moved his face to the side and traced his nose to her neck.

He inhaled deeply, enjoying the scent that he associated with his woman; an earthy but clean scent that could only be described as uniquely hers.

Kouga started placing teasing, featherlight, kisses down her neck; enjoying her taste and the quickening of her breath. He also enjoyed it immensely when his tongue flicked out, teasing an especially sensitive spot on her collarbone which made her moan and push herself against him.

''Touch me,'' she whispered oh so alluringly into his ear before she reclaimed his lips into a frenzied dance.

''Kagome,'' he groaned, voice thick with contained need. He tightened his hold on her thigh and growled when she roughly bit his lip. ''Wolf princess,'' he croaked out in a harsh breath.

In a blink of an eye, Kouga had Kagome placed gently on her back with her arms still locked around his neck. Any doubts she head flew out of her mind when his eyes searched her azure orbs for any hesitation. When he found none, he moved to straddle her waist and made sure to push all his weight onto his knees.

His eyes roamed hungrily over the beautiful woman that was splayed seductively under him. Unable to take another moment of not touching her he started tracing his fingertips gently and teasingly down the side of her neck and collarbone.

Kagome tilted her head to the side, making Kouga moan in appreciation at the innocent way she had submitted to him.

He continued his path down between her breasts, his eyes never leaving her face, and rested his palm against her erratically beating heart.

He smiled at the small gasp that passed her slightly parted lips and chuckled at the way her eyes fluttered shut in contentment.

''Are you sure you want me to touch you, wolf princess?'' he asked her huskily, his mouth going dry at the thought of finally being able to touch his woman in a way he's always wanted to.

Kagome's eyes fluttered back open, and he was surprised to see that they had darkened and filled considerably with expectation and hunger. ''I'm sure,'' she whispered sultrily, giving him a slight nod of her head as she bit her lip before embarrassedly looking away from him.

''You're so unbelievably beautiful,'' he murmured and allowed his eyes to rake down her soft body and then back up to her angelic face.

He reached down with both his hands, looked into her eyes for permission, and slowly pulled off the strange clothing that covered the top part of her body. He placed a gentle kiss on every inch that was revealed to him before he pulled back to remove it from her completely.

He threw the shirt to the side and couldn't help his eyes from wandering over her ample chest. He had never seen such bindings before, but they had her breast pushed together in a way that sent any of his remaining blood rushing south. Unable to stop himself he kissed the top of each breast and ran a hand down over her flat stomach, enjoying the feeling of her soft skin under his touch.

His wolf princess unlocked her arms from around his neck, pushed herself off the floor and reached behind her back.

She sat up and pushed herself onto her elbows, giving Kouga a tentative smile. She allowed the straps to fall from her shoulders teasingly before she pulled it off and bared herself to him completely.

Kagome watched his face for a reaction and was pleased to see his hungry eyes ravishing her, drinking in every inch she had offered him.

''So perfect,'' he told her in a deep and husky voice that sent electrifying tingles down to her core.

Entranced by her beauty, he reached for her right breast and squeezed gently before running a blunt nail over her perked nipple.

Kagome moaned and pushed her chest into his large hand, enjoying the way it felt against her.

''Does my wolf princess enjoy me playing with her breasts?'' he asked her, losing himself entirely to loving her and ignored any prior worries he may have had.

Kagome groaned and gave him a quick nod making him smirked at her. ''Would my wolf princess like me to lick her hard nipple? Maybe she even wants me to nibble on it,'' he teased, gently tweaking her sensitive nipple.

''Oh, Kouga,'' she moaned, head falling back in pleasure. ''Please,'' she moaned, arching further into him, needing to feel as much of him as possible.

When he felt her brush against his fur covered hardness Kouga growled deep within his chest and pushed back against her. He didn't need her to ask again, he lowered his lips to her nipple, gave it a gentle kiss and flicked his tongue teasingly around it. His eyes sought out hers and once they locked together, he nibbled and sucked before giving her a sharp bite.

''Kouga!'' she screamed, thrashing around and making his hardness twitch. She reached out with one hand and tugged at his armor. ''Remove it,'' she ordered in a breathy voice, wanting to feel his bare chest pressed against hers.

He made quick work of his furs and armor and tossed them to the side as she had commanded, all too happy to comply with her demand.

Kagome took a moment to appreciate the sight before her and couldn't help but blush at what she saw.

Her eyes roamed over his broad shoulders and sculptured chest and bit her lip in admiration ''So handsome,'' she breathed out appreciatively, sending her blush over the rest of her body.

She blushed even hotter when her eyes landed on his impressive looking manhood and quickly continued her track towards his strong and muscular thighs.

Kouga leaned down and suckled on her neck, enjoying the way her small hands started roaming up his chest and down his back. He placed his hand on her thigh, slowly inching it up until her skirt was bunched up at her hips.

''Oh,'' she gasped when he ran a finger over her soaked panties.

''You smell so unbelievably good, Kagome,'' he said, deeply inhaling the delicious scent of her arousal. ''Will you allow me to taste you?'' he asked her, almost desperate in his need.

Kagome shivered when his deep voice caressed her ear and nodded her consent.

''Tell me you want me to taste you,'' he demanded, teasingly running his finger against her cloth covered clit whilst the other continued playing with her breast.

''Kou-ga,'' she croaked, pushing against his hand.

''Tell me,'' he demanded throatily, pulling his hands away from her.

''I want you to taste me,'' she moaned desperately, pulling herself up so she could kiss his shoulder and neck. ''I want to feel your lips and tongue against me,'' she pleaded, rocking her hips into him.

In one swift movement, he ripped off her silk panties and had her legs spread with his tongue against her clit, circling it teasingly before suckling on it.

''Kouga!'' she moaned, pushing herself against his talented tongue. ''Oh kami,'' she sighed and bit down on her lip, trashing her head from side to side. ''O-oh, Kouga, that feels s-ooh! Mmmm... soo good,'' she hissed and collapsed onto her back, running her hands through her hair as she locked her legs around his head and pushed him closer.

Kagome was already feeling a delicious, burning, coiling inside her stomach; when he hummed and moaned against her, sparks shot through all her nerves, leaving her blind to anything but the pleasure she was feeling.

''So delicious, princess,'' he told her with a deep voice filled with need.

He pushed his tongue into her weeping hole and moaned when she bucked up her hips uncontrollably against him. He returned his tongue to her clit, enjoying the way her body was so responsive to him.

Knowing what she needed, Kouga pushed a finger inside her wet walls and pumped gently, not wanting to hurt her. He then added a second, closing his eyes at the tight feeling of her velvet walls around his finger and imagined what it would be like to push his aching hardness into her leaking and waiting hole.

''Princess,'' he groaned. ''So tight and wet, so ready for me, so delicious.''

''Don't stop,'' she nearly screamed, her whole-body tensing and he knew that his woman was close. A few more licks and caresses had her tumbling over the edge, darkness now replaced by a blinding light that burned to her very soul.

She felt warm, safe and cared for, here in Kouga's arms. Bliss, she was feeling complete bliss.

''I've just witnessed the most beautiful sight,'' he whispered with an air of confession.

Kagome opened her eyes and looked at the man that had given her such bliss and felt her fevered body burn even hotter under his heated gaze.

''Would you allow me to join us as one, my wolf princess?'' he asked her, dark eyes swirling with desire and affection. ''Would you allow me to make you feel more pleasure than you have ever before in your life?''

''Yes,'' she breathed. ''Make me remember only your name and your touches. Help me reclaim my heart,'' she begged, searching his eyes for what she was craving.

''Your heart will be yours again,'' he promised. ''If not, I shall give you my own, and I swear it will protect your soul,'' he told her before claiming her lips in a passionate kiss.

* * *

Kagome was the first to wake up, and it took her a few moments to remember the activities she took part in that morning. She opened her eyes and found her head nestled comfortably between Kouga's neck and shoulder. She shuffled around a bit and noticed that the rest of her body was covering Kouga's own, with her right leg thrown over his hip and the other resting between his legs.

Gently she pulled away from Kouga and tried to untangle her body from his without waking him up. Once she was safely standing next to him, she smiled softly down at the wolf demon that had dedicated hours to make her feel special.

She felt her whole body flush as she remembered what he had done to her. No, everything he had done _for_ her.

She moved away from his resting form and made her way towards the entrance of the cave.

The cave rested on the side of a cliff, so high that she could see the towering trees beneath her, but hidden from everyone else's sight.

The winds caressed her, and she sighed, enjoying the cool breeze as it glided over her bare skin which was still so sensitive from all the attention she had gotten.

The sun had already started to set over the horizon, cloaking the sky in different shades of orange, red, pink and purple.

Only this morning she felt incapable of going on. She had been about to give up everything because of the agony that had consumed her.

A few hours ago she had believed that there had been no hope left for her, and she had honestly thought that there was no end to her torment; trapped in a prison of heartache and misery. Since this morning everything had changed because now she had hope. Now she was saved.

Darkness still surrounded her, and her heart has not suddenly repaired itself but at least she could breathe a bit easier now. Other memories, more pleasant ones, were slowly pushing away her nightmares and her heart started beating quicker for different reasons, more exciting ones.

No more was she consumed by a fierce need to flee from her emotions.

Did her emotions hurt and drive her insane with their intensity? Yes, there is no disputing that, but she is a strong woman that will one day be able to move on from this horrible ordeal. Last night Kouga had shown her that it was possible to forget, for however fleeting the moments were, she had completely forgotten about her misery. He had convinced her that she was going to get better and that she was worth more than she believed. He did this not only by worshipping her body but also with the way he couldn't seem to take his eyes while he caressed her cheek so adoringly.

Kouga stirred awake not long after Kagome had left his side, already able to miss her closeness. He slowly opened his eyes and was pleasantly surprised to find his woman still naked, looking like an absolute vision standing in front of the sunset with her long hair playing with the winds.

He drank the sight she had gifted him in and stayed quiet, granting her the silence he knew she sought.

He watched her face and was glad to see that she looked well rested. Darkness still swirled in her azure eyes, but where this morning they had been lifeless, they now sparked with determination. Her back had also straightened, inviting the world to dare try and break her.

His wolf princess, always so strong-willed. He couldn't have chosen a better intended.

She would smile and laugh again, and her eyes will one day be free of any darkness, he would make sure of it, he swore his life on it.

Kagome had felt Kouga's eyes on her but didn't turn away from the beautiful view of the sunset.

''Last night I made a stupid decision and followed a path I knew would only lead to my heartache. I could have spared myself all this trouble had I just left things well alone,'' she chuckled humorlessly. ''I ran, I don't know how long but I ran till my legs couldn't carry me anymore, and my chest was creaking in protest. That, that horrible youkai made me see things, things that almost broke me and things I'll never be able to un-see,'' she choked out.

She cleared her throat, trying to ease the slight burning in her throat and continued, smiling wearily. ''You saved me when I left myself for dead, and you fought for me even when my mind had started slipping away from me. You saved me from that demon and myself,'' she finished in a whisper.

Suddenly she felt Kouga's familiar and powerful arms wrap around her waist from behind her. He pulled her against his chest and rested his chin on her shoulder, eyes looking out into the darkening sky.

''Let me, and I'll never allow anyone to hurt you again, my wolf princess. Grant me permission, Kagome, and I'll never leave your side,'' he vowed, placing a warm kiss on the side of her neck.

''If you concede,'' he said carefully and deliberately, voice dropping to a sensual drawl. ''I shall make you my queen,'' he swore, and her eyes widened at the implication. ''You will be my whole world, and I will be yours. My wolf will protect you and tare your enemies to shreds. If my princess allows it, I shall be the only one she will ever need.''

Kagome turned around in his arms and placed her hand on his chest above his heart, feeling the quickening pace beneath her fingertips. She looked up into his eyes and saw how vulnerable those words had left him.

Kouga had always claimed her to be his, he had never felt the need to ask her for her opinion or permission, but here he was, truly and honestly offering himself to her. Offering her everything he was and only asking her to be his in return.

''If you give me time to allow me to heal and help me find my way back, I'll be yours and only yours, just like you'll be mine,'' she promised him before pushing herself onto her toes and leaning in to brush her lips against his.

''I'll help you,'' he promised between kisses. ''You'll be mine, wolf princess, but for now, let me take you to the hot-spring I spotted not far away.''

* * *

 **Hi everyone ^_^**

 **I hope you all enjoyed this one-shot! I've got a bonus chapter almost ready, so if you would like to read it let me know :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**I dedicate this chapter to those people that took a few moments of their time and left a review to reassure me that there are people out there that enjoy my work.**

 **Thanks, everyone!**

* * *

Kouga and Kagome were at the hot springs, enjoying the steams and a relaxing soak in the clean water. He was combing his hand through her hair, rinsing it gently, smiling ever so often at the contented sighs that escaped her.

He was still wrapping his mind around the fact that Kagome wanted to be with him. He knows that she had a long road of healing ahead of her, he also knew that she didn't love him, not yet, but she will one day, he was sure of it.

He is going to do everything in his power to show her that they were always meant to be together. One day, Inuyasha and the emotion-feeder will be a long-forgotten memory.

''My friends are probably frantic with worry,'' she said, breaking their comfortable silence.

''I'm surprised they haven't found you yet,'' he muttered into her hair. ''But I'm happy they didn't. It gave us more time together, alone,'' he told her, pushing her back into his chest.

''It did,'' she agreed with a small giggle, but Kouga could see the concern shining in her eyes.

''I can take you to your friends,'' he offered reluctantly.

''I don't want to, but I have to,'' she sighed. ''Shippo and Sango are probably worried sick about me-''

Kouga's nose twitched, and he held out a finger to Kagome, silencing the rest of her sentence.

''I don't think you have to worry about finding your friends, Kagome,'' he told her wearily.

''They're here?'' she shrieked, turning around and standing up from out of the water. When the cool evening breeze swept and danced across her wet and naked body, she quickly sat back down into the water.

''I'll get your clothes,'' he offered, getting out of the warm water.

Kagome didn't even bother drying herself off, she got dressed as quick as she could and tried to ignore the way her clothes clung to her wet skin.

She looked at Kouga with a panic-stricken face and trembling hands. ''I'm not ready for this,'' she gasped through her quickening intakes of breath.

Kouga knew that she wanted him to take her away, but he also knew that the mutt wouldn't stop following them and at some point, he is going to catch up to them.

He picked up his armor and slipped it on, looking at her with conflicted eyes. He closed the distance between them and cupped her face between his palms. ''You are not alone,'' he told her fiercely. ''He can't hurt you anymore. I won't let him,'' he promised her before giving her a quick but deep kiss. He pulled back and searched her eyes. ''Do you trust me?'' he asked her with a sense of urgency.

Kagome gulped quietly and looked at the face of the man that had promised to spend the rest of his life with her. He said he would never leave her and she believed him.

''Yes, I trust you,'' she smiled and laughed when Kouga's face split into a huge smile. He picked her up and twirled her around making her giggle into his shoulder.

Kouga was about to say something to her when they heard Inuyasha calling out to her in the distance. They gave each other a wary look, only a few seconds later Inuyasha broke through the tree line and once his eyes landed on Kagome he stumbled to an abrupt halt.

''Kagome!'' he exclaimed, obviously relieved to have finally found her. When his brain was able to process who it was that she was with Inuyasha clenched his jaw and narrowed his eyes. ''What the hell are you doing with the fleabag? Get your filthy hands off of her,'' he screamed, face turning red with anger.

''I'd shut up If I were you, dog-breath,'' Kouga warned him with a growl, pushing Kagome so that she was standing behind him.

Inuyasha just scoffed and decided to ignore Kouga for the time being and turned and looked at Kagome. ''Do you have any idea how long I've been looking for you?'' he asked her with a snarl. ''We were worried sick about you, and I find you with the damn wolf?''

''You mustn't have been looking for very long,'' she muttered darkly trying to ignore the disturbing way her heart was pounding at the sight of him.

''Excuse me!'' he screeched, voice rising a few pitches in disbelieve.

''You heard me,'' she told him with a shrug, trying to act as indifferent as she could. ''If you had been looking for me you would have found me ages ago, Inuyasha. We both know that, so stop making a scene,'' she huffed, stepping closer to Kouga and seeking out his hand for support.

''Stop making a scene?'' he asked her, amber eyes wide and uncomprehending. ''Everyone is worried sick, you wench!''

''Watch your mouth, mutt,'' Kouga growled, taking a menacing step towards Inuyasha.

''Mind your own damn business,'' he threatened taking out Tessaiga.

''Kagome is my business,'' Kouga bellowed, ''You better back away before I make you eat dirt.''

''Don't you ever learn? Kagome isn't your woman. How many times does she have to tell you that she doesn't want you? Did you kidnap her again?'' he asked him, pointing the sword at his face.

''Inuyasha, stop,'' Kagome ordered, stepping out from behind Kouga.

''Why are you always protecting him? The deluded pervert kidnapped you again!''

''He didn't kidnap me, Inuyasha. Stop being stupid,'' she told him, crossing her arms over her chest.

''Stupid? What am I supposed to think then? That you just took off without saying anything to anyone?''

''Yes! That's what you're supposed to think,'' she screamed, throwing her hands in the air in frustration. ''Kouga saved me, so stop this right now and drop Tessaiga,'' she demanded, rapidly tapping her foot against the floor.

''He saved you?'' he asked her, the tip of his sword dropping to the floor in surprise.

''Yes, I had to rescue her again because you're a shit protector,'' Kouga rubbed in with a smug look on his face.

''Well if you hadn't run off you wouldn't have needed saving,'' Inuyasha told Kagome, ignoring Kouga's jibe.

''I know,'' she growled, looking away from him. She shook her head and tried to get rid of the flashes of him and Kikyo together. ''Fact of the matter is that he saved me, so back off.''

Inuyasha suddenly went very still and he started blinking his eyes before looking between the two of them repeatedly, brows creased in confusion.

''Why the fuck do you smell like the dirty wolf?'' he asked her calmly, but his shoulders were tense and ready for attack.

Kagome looked away from him and tried not to blush but failed miserably. ''None of your business. We need to get to the others, show them I'm fine.''

''Fine? FINE?'' he screamed, his whole body shaking with suppressed rage. He opened his mouth several times trying to express himself, but he ended up growling and launching for Kouga with his claws.

''Inuyasha! Stop this right now!'' she shrieked at him.

''What the fuck did you do to Kagome?'' Inuyasha yelled, turning back around to face Kouga when he sidestepped him.

Kouga ignored him and turned to Kagome. ''Get out of here before you get hurt,'' he ordered, blocking a punch to his face.

''I'm not leaving you,'' she cried, shaking her head. ''Inuyasha! Stop! Kouga didn't do anything I didn't want him to!''

Inuyasha stopped mid-swing and turned to look at her with a deep scowl on his face. ''That's supposed to make this better? You were vulnerable, and he took advantage of you, Kagome! Don't you see that?''

''No, that's not what happened. You don't know what happened to me in the past few hours. You don't know anything about me or how I feel. So, stop trying to attack Kouga and let's make a move,'' she pleaded, trying to fight back the tears that threatened to fall.

''Then tell me what happened,'' he demanded, moving in her direction but Kouga stepped between them, bearing his teeth at Inuyasha.

''I don't want to talk about it. Can you please, just this once, do as I ask?'' Kagome pleaded with wide and innocent azure eyes.

''Tell me what the fuck happened,'' he demanded in a chilling tone, eyes seeping crimson.

''She said she doesn't want to talk about it, mutt-face,'' Kouga warned, wanting nothing more than to crush the half breed's skull against the floor.

''Didn't I tell you to mind your own damn business,'' Inuyasha snarled.

''That's it!'' Kouga snapped, delivering a kick straight to Inuyasha's chin, sending him flying backward a few feet.

''Kouga!'' Kagome cried exasperatedly.

Inuyasha leaped back to his feet and wiped away the blood dripping from his mouth.

''Tell me Kouga. Did you have it all planned out? Did you save Kagome just so that you could get between her legs?'' he asked him with a cruel smile on his face before bringing forth Tessaiga and taking a swing at him.

Kouga leaped back and managed to dodge the attack. He rolled his neck and shoulders, preparing himself.

''Does your stupid mouth ever produce anything useful, mutt?'' He asked him before running at him.

''Stop it! Both of you!'' Kagome screamed frantically.

Kouga ducked Inuyasha's swing and rammed his head into Inuyasha's chest, sending him flying back into the hot spring with a huge splash.

Inuyasha quickly emerged from the water and landed directly in front of Kouga.

All three of them were too immersed in the fight to notice the others arriving.

''Kagome!'' Shippo cried out in relief when he saw her.

She turned around and noticed all her friends on Kirara's back.

''Quick! Give me my bow and arrows,'' she demanded urgently, her eyes wide with panic.

''What's going on Kagome?'' Sango asked her, grabbing her bow and arrows and jumping off Kirara's back.

Kagome rushed to her but ignored her question. She grabbed her bow, got out an arrow and turned to Kouga and Inuyasha.

Kouga was crouched, holding his side and he also had a bloody gash on his forehead. Her heart turned cold at the thought of something happening to Kouga. Before she knew what she was doing, she screamed the one command that could stop him.

''Inuyasha, Sit!''

The silver-haired half demon got sent head first into the hard rock ground. Inuyasha quickly shrugged it off and leaped back to his feet, preparing to rant at her, no doubt, but any words got stuck in his throat when he noticed an arrow pointed at him only an inch away from his face.

''What the hell are you doing, Kagome?'' he asked her edgily but didn't move an inch from his current position.

''I already told you to stop this, but you don't listen,'' she told him calmly, surprised at how steady her hands were holding the bow.

''You're not pointing an arrow at the wolf, are you?'' he growled, stepping away from the arrow aimed at him. ''First, you betray me, and then you point an arrow at me? How treacherous can a person get?''

Kagome blinked at him, not quite able to comprehend the insulting words spilling out of his mouth because he couldn't possibly be saying what she thought she heard.

''Betray you? I betrayed you?'' she chuckled darkly, face settling into an emotionless mask. ''How do you even have the gall to say that to me?'' she asked him with a crocked voice. ''After you once again ran after- after Kikyo,'' she choked out, unable to stop the tears from spilling out.

Inuyasha stilled for a moment but was quick to shrug off the shock.

''You spied on me?'' he asked her in an accusatory tone.

''Does it matter?'' she retorted, not about to allow him to make her feel ashamed of herself. ''All that matters is what I saw, and what I saw was you and Kikyo making love to each other, so don't you talk to me about betrayal. Who knows how long this has been going on between the two of you.''

''Kagome,'' Inuyasha whispered with his eyes wide and filled with regret, probably not at his actions but at being caught. ''I-''

''There is nothing you can say to me, Inuyasha'' she cut him off before he could make things worse. ''You can be with Kikyo. You don't have to hide anymore because I don't care, but don't interfere in mine and Kouga's relationship. I will be with him if I want and there is nothing you can say or do about it.''

''So, you see me with Kikyo one time, and now you're ready to leave me for the wolf?''

''Leave you? How can I leave you when we were never together? You've made it quite clear that I'll never be enough for you. You made it clear that you don't want me. So why is it a problem if I decide to give Kouga a chance? What's wrong with finally leaving behind my delusions of a relationship ever happening between us and moving on with my life? Are you the only one allowed to do what they want?'' she challenged him, taking a step forward and steadying her aim again.

''Maybe we should just take a step back and take a deep bre-''

''Shut up, Miroku,'' Inuyasha and Kagome snapped simultaneously, then turned back to glare at each other. Miroku closed his mouth and kept quiet after that, not wanting to come between them while Kagome still had an arrow pointed at Inuyasha's head.

''You promised you'll never leave,'' he accused her, crossing his arms over his chest and looking away from her.

''Me being with Kouga doesn't mean that I'm leaving, Inuyasha. I still have to find the jewel shards. You are going to have to accept that this is happening, Inuyasha. Just like how I am going to have to get used to you and Kikyo being together,'' she told him firmly but lowered her bow.

''I don't have to accept anything!'' Inuyasha screamed.

''Why can't you just do as you're told, mutt-face?'' Kouga sighed, wrapping a protective arm around Kagome's waist.

''Get your filthy paw off Kagome!'' Inuyasha demanded, taking a step towards them, but Kagome already had her bow raised back into place and ready to shoot.

''This isn't going to work, Inuyasha. If you can't accept this I will have to leave,'' she warned him.

''You're choosing him over me?'' Inuyasha cried, balling his hands into fists.

''You chose Kikyo over me, didn't you?'' she asked rhetorically, rolling her eyes at him.

''I didn't! You're only assuming that I chose her, Kagome.''

''That's even worse! How can you toy with my feelings, knowing that I loved you?'' she sniffled and hiccupped.

''You know it's complicated! I thought you understood,'' he grumbled, running an agitated hand through his hair.

''What's there to understand, Inuyasha? You love her. Now respect me enough to let me go,'' she said, eyes pleading with him not to draw this out any longer than they had to.

It hurt. It hurt a lot to say these things to him, but she knew that she had to. She was ready to start moving on with her life, she couldn't let Inuyasha ruin this for her.

''I don't want-'' he started to say, but Kagome quickly cut him off.

''I don't care about what you want. You never cared about what I wanted, so why should I? I'll leave for a little while and give you some time to cool off. I hope that we can be friends again one day,'' she told him, hiding her pained eyes behind her bangs. She couldn't let him see how painful it was for her to let him go.

''So that's it? You're just going to leave with him?'' Inuyasha asked her, voice barely a whisper.

''That's it,'' she agreed, clearing her throat.

''Kagome! What about me? Don't leave me!'' Shippo cried, leaping off Miroku's back and ran into her arms.

Kagome picked him up and held him close to her chest. ''You can come with us, isn't that right Kouga?'' She asked him in a sickly-sweet tone.

''No questions asked,'' Kouga replied, rubbing at the back of his neck nervously.

''Great! Are we going to the wolf den?'' Shippo asked them, sounding very excited at the prospect.

''I have to stop by and make sure that everything is alright, let them know that the emotion-feeder is dead-''

''Emotion-feeder?'' interrupted Sango sounding very worried. ''Did one attack you last night, Kagome?''

''Kouga saved me just in time,'' she reassured her, trying to give her a genuine smile but failing miserably as a wave of intense and dark emotions swept over her.

''You were lucky that Kouga found you then, lady Kagome,'' Miroku told her, eyeing the dejected looking Inuyasha wearily.

''I was,'' she agreed with a short nod. ''We'll be back soon,'' she promised, taking Kouga's hand in hers.

''Here, take your bag,'' Sango told her, turning around to get it for her.

''Thanks,'' Kagome said, taking the bag from her but Kouga was quick to grab it.

''I'll carry this for you,'' he told her sweetly, dimples in his face showing.

''What about the shards?'' Inuyasha tried one last time to deter her from her plans.

Kagome turned her eyes heavenwards and then turned to glare at him. ''If I come across any shards I'm sure Kouga will be able to help me get them. He does have two shards of his own you know,'' she taunted knowing that it would hurt him, but she didn't care. He needed to get the message that she was done dancing to his tune.

''Goodbye, Inuyasha,'' she whispered, looked at him one last time before turning away.

Hours later Inuyasha was still standing in the same spot she had left him, unable to move, not wanting to believe that she was actually gone.

''I love you,'' he whispered, trying to swallow down the bile that had risen in his throat wondering why he couldn't have told her that earlier. Maybe she wouldn't have left if he had told her.

Now it was too late.

She was gone and the instant that thought sunk into his mind his heart broke.

''Don't you smell delicious,'' a voice echoed around him startling him out of his depressing thoughts.

''Fuck,'' he groaned when he saw the mist gathering at his feet. ''This is not going to end well,'' he sighed.

''No, it isn't'' the echoing voice agreed with a chuckle.

* * *

 **So, that was the small bonus chapter I mentioned. I hope that some of you guys enjoyed this.**

 **I want to once again thank the people that left a review on this fiction and encouraged me to continue it. Your kind words were very much** **appreciated!**

 **Also, a huge thanks to all of you who are following the story and/or decided to favorite Delicious Heartache!**


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